Dicks on the cover


So SFist likes our cover this week. I haven't heard any complaints yet, but we'll get some. And they'll be utterly predictable: Why are there penises on the front page, right out there (as my mother used to say) in front of God and everyone?

Here's the thing: I've been doing this a long time, and we've put a lot of naked people on the cover (nude beaches, sex issue, random stories about public nakedness) -- and when it's just women, nobody peeps. Full frontal, whatever -- it seems in our society that it's perfectly okay to show the unclothed female body. But not a dick. God, not a dick.

I've often wondered why a movie that shows tits and (female) asses can get away with a PG-13 rating and even full-frontal female, and lots of it, only gets you an R. But a single glimpse of a male organ, even in its unaroused state, automatically turns a movie into NC-17.

What, are penises really that scary? Or are most of the censors guys who have, you know, issues?'

>>See the full cover in our Nude Beaches Guide 2012



Why when people go to advocate for progressive policies at city hall those people are righteous, why when people go to city hall and advocate for non progressive policies those people are called a "mob"?

I blame society.

Posted by matlock on Jul. 18, 2012 @ 6:42 pm

The fact that you know brontez radically changes my perception of you. Granted you are an anonymous frequent poster but could you please humor me and spell out some of your semographics?

Posted by Nate on Jul. 19, 2012 @ 1:23 am
Posted by matlock on Jul. 18, 2012 @ 11:03 pm

He's one of the biggest dicks around here.

Figuratively speaking, of course.

Posted by Guest on Jul. 18, 2012 @ 11:19 pm


The Dicks are one of the greatest punk bands of all times and you are a stain.

Posted by matlock on Jul. 18, 2012 @ 11:31 pm

People tell policemen
They've met their match
Down in them desert sands
Dicks won't catch

Dicks hates policemen, yes, it's true
You can't find justice, it'll find you
It'll find you
It'll find you
It'll find you

Posted by marcos on Jul. 19, 2012 @ 5:27 am

therefrom to take a passing whack at one of the greatest subculture guitarist/singer/songwriters.

I'd be bummed out about that except I know that Matlock doesn't know shit about it. Its part of his formula: try to sound cool as a springboard for further insult against decency and sense.


Posted by lillipublicans on Apr. 27, 2013 @ 9:04 pm

I see Gary Floyd a couple times a year and we bullshit some. He lives a few blocks from me.

Saw the Dicks in the 80's at the Satyricon. One of maybe two dozen people there.

Used to own "these people." Never bothered to buy the P.E.A.C.E comp as other than the Dicks it was all shitty.

Now rant about how I'm name dropping.

No wrong answer for you right?

How do you find these old posts and why do you bother to post to them?

Posted by Matlock on Apr. 27, 2013 @ 9:56 pm

I'm at the bookstore
I'm at the bookstore
You're at the bookstore too!

Posted by marcos on Jul. 19, 2012 @ 9:32 am

I don't want to know your name

Posted by matlock on Jul. 19, 2012 @ 6:16 pm

Nice cover. I like it. People who have hang-ups about nudity have issues, and unfortunately they'll never do anything about them.

"Why are there penises on the front page, right out there (as my mother used to say) in front of God and everyone?"


"The Almighty" can't handle seeing penises? "The Omnipotent" can't deal with penises? Oh I don't believe that. That big tough "guy" can't handle that? Why would "God" have a problem with penises? "He" supposedly made them if one believes the mythology.

Yes, there is a double standard in the U.S. society when it comes to M and F nudity. The double standard is called fucked up, like many other things in this country.

Posted by Guest on Jul. 18, 2012 @ 11:15 pm

Why is there a double standard around people who want to use you as a subject of their fetish? Who knows? I don't think a god has anything to do with it, likely something very run of the mill.

Naked women don't want you to be involved with this fetish, they never even seem interested in involving you or me. What is the double standard?

Naked dudes want you to take part in their fetish with no choice made on your part, and that is OK? I guess it isn't a double standard, women are just not interested in such things. Men get the extra right in SF to involve others in their fetish.

Posted by matlock on Jul. 18, 2012 @ 11:49 pm

...then they should be able to wear nothing. There are tons of people who choose to "involve others" in their own person hideous fashion fetishes, without any choice on my part. Mostly women in this particular case. Personally, I'm secure enough in my own skin that I have no interest in being anyone's fashion police, but unless we have a policy of asking me what I think is aesthetically pleasing to me every time a woman or man wants to go outside, I think we all need to get over our hangups and let people look as they please, whether that means they want to go out in a full burka, or nothing at all.

BTW... I've seen lots of women go nude on Baker Beach

Posted by Greg on Jul. 19, 2012 @ 7:32 am

You could just as easily state that heteros pushing children in strollers are forcing their twisted sexual reproduction fetishes onto the rest of us, what the way that children are ascribed status of endangered species around here.

Don't get me started on how disturbing it it is to me to watch fat people are forcing us to watch their slow suicide, right out in pub(l)ic.

Combine the fatties and the urban nudists and you merely conceal the problem penis under never ending folds of fat.

Posted by marcos on Jul. 19, 2012 @ 7:50 am

The much loved penis gets a cover shot. Matlock- you are nuts-I know a woman who went into a major row w her hubby when he threw out her Brad Pitt Playgirl! BTW - nudity at beaches or the spas is generally not fetishized.

Posted by Guest on Jul. 19, 2012 @ 2:49 am
Posted by Guest on Jul. 19, 2012 @ 2:50 am

When SFBG has to resort to publishing photographs of penises on its cover in a misguided effort gin up readership, you know the paper must be in serious trouble. Sad.

Posted by Guest on Jul. 19, 2012 @ 8:10 am

of doing it, so something must be working. Or else we live in very desperate times.

Posted by admin on Jul. 19, 2012 @ 9:06 am

Yes, well - you were just SOLD, yes?

Desparation it is.

Posted by Guest on Jul. 20, 2012 @ 12:44 pm

you're welcome.

Posted by admin on Jul. 20, 2012 @ 12:57 pm

Love the SFBG but the cover screams of a desperate plea for attention. Better to burn out than fade away, guys...

Posted by Guest on Jul. 19, 2012 @ 9:52 am

for enjoying the visual splendor (and heft) of a man's penis.

Posted by Chromefields on Jul. 19, 2012 @ 11:50 am

Thank you to the Guardian for showing the penises. I, myself, am very pro-penis.
I am not necessarily pro-(Anthony) Weiner, and definitely not pro-(John) Boehner.
But, of course, I am very pro-penis. One can not be anti-penis. Being anti-penis is like being anti-American.
I was dismayed when your May 2010 article "The Mitchell Sister" failed to inquire if the historic theater would be offering any entertainment for the pro-penis among us.
If given the opportunity, I would be happy to celebrate my pro-penis(ness) in San Francisco.

Posted by Erika McDonald on Jul. 19, 2012 @ 1:06 pm

Don't forget former Idaho Senator Larry Craig, who took perhaps the widest of stances when it came to penis.

You can always check out the Nob Hill Theatre for all of the live, throbbing penis you want:


Posted by marcos on Jul. 19, 2012 @ 1:17 pm

Doesn't the SFBG accept advertizing from message parlors (I mean prostitutes), marijuana dispensaries (I mean drug dealers), and escorts (I mean prostitutes) ?

It's clear to me SFBG appeals to the lowest common denominator, it use to be funny but not anymore, it's sad and pathetic.

Class can be learned. Try it.

Posted by Mike on Jul. 19, 2012 @ 4:44 pm

There you go bringing class into it again.

Posted by marcos on Jul. 19, 2012 @ 5:09 pm

There are naked people on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel (you know, over the head of the Pope); there are naked people sculpted outside my state capital building. It's just nice to see real people on the cover of a magazine for a change (*gasp* - the girl even has a stomach!).

Posted by Phil on Jul. 21, 2012 @ 8:35 am

You suck

Posted by Guest on Jul. 29, 2012 @ 2:18 pm

Black Men with big dick is a myth! LOL

Posted by Heather on Aug. 03, 2012 @ 10:17 pm

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